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Wednesday, August 25, 2010

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Thanks everybody for checking out my blog. The need for  flexibility in covering different topics prompted me to move to a new site. Please follow me to the new venue by clicking on:

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Thanks. Peace and Blessings!

Tuesday, August 24, 2010

Saturday, August 21, 2010

Are We Humans or Animals?

Let's all take a moment and reflect on our humanity.
An 8 year-old child was arrested at a public market in Iran for stealing a loaf of bread. He was punished right on the spot in the name of Islam. His hand will be crushed by a car. He will lose his hand for ever! What is wrong with us, Humans?

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

French Army is colonizing Africa a second time!


This is modern days colonization. A highly ranked French Colonel is threatening a journalist in Togo (West Africa). Speaking of civilization, judge for yourselves who behaved in a  more civilized way between the Togolese journalist and the French Colonel.

Sunday, August 15, 2010

Why is grass greener on the other side?

I was invited to a spiritual workshop today. The theme was about self-compassion. The coach explained that in the 80s and 90s, most researches focused on self-esteem, but nowadays, the trend is about self-compassion. Basically, the lesson was about how to love ourselves first before loving others and how to accept the predicament we are in, in order to change. We had a couple of exercises. On the first, we were given a piece of paper to write our harshest judgment; on the second, we were asked to write three things that we appreciate the most about ourselves. At the end, people were asked to read what they wrote if they wanted to.



Hundred percent of the people attending the workshop read their harshest judgment on themselves. Only thirty percent read the three things that they appreciated about themselves and seventy percent, either didn't want to read their positives, or didn't find anything positive about them. I was intrigued to see how people chose to focus more on the things that were negative in their lives than those that are positive. I thought that it was our human condition to blame ourselves. To think that the worst things happen only to us, that the others are always better than us, that we don't deserve anything good, that the neighbors are happier than us, that grass is greener on the other side. Then I tried to play the same scenario in my head and projected it onto Africa. If the same scenario had taken place in Africa in general and in Cameroon in particular, we might have had a different result.



The African child is raised to love himself and bring happiness to his family/community. He knows that his community depends on his achievements. He understands the role that he has to play to make his family proud. He is aware that the only way to accomplish big things is to find that inner peace, love and compassion. He is more focused on being happy rather than sad; on appreciating what is positive about him; on living day-to-day rather than worry about tomorrow, which he has no control over; he is raised to be honest, genuine, loyal and truthful. He is convinced that grass is greener in his heart and not on the other side.



As the only African in that workshop, I tried to understand why most people there were so prolific about negative things in their lives? Why didn’t they want to read their positives? Why did they look so unhappy and miserable? Why were they so pessimistic? Why did they look like prisoners of life? What could explain their predicament? Then, I began to receive some answers to my questions, which I will talk about in my next post.

Thursday, August 12, 2010

This is America!

As usual, thanks again for your constructive feedbacks. Some of you have suggested that I should post shorter articles. I appreciate your suggestion and think it is a good idea.

There is one thing that I am struggling with. I don't know if I should call it politeness or hypocrisy. One day at work, I had a misunderstanding with a female colleague and she went to complain to our supervisor. A male colleague came to warn me about that female colleague and said that she was a bad person. He told me that the female colleague had been telling lies about me behind my back. He informed me that he and the female colleague have been smoking weed at work in front of the clients (we work with developmentally delayed kids). He suggested that if the supervisor ever called me to ask about what was happening at work with the clients, I should not hesitate to mention what he had told me.

A couple of days later, the supervisor summoned me and the female colleague to settle our issues. When I was asked to say what was going on, I said exactly what my male colleague had told me. The situation got worse and my male colleague got furious and very mad at me. He blamed me for having mentioned his name while he had asked me to do just that in the first place. I reminded him that he was the one who suggested that I should mention his name. He said: "this is America!" When I asked him to tell me what that meant, he retorted that I still had a lot to learn. He said: "In America, they raise us to be polite. They ask us to never be rude even if you have to lie. If you hate somebody, or you don't like something, or you are mad at someone, you should not show that. You must laugh and pretend that everything is fine, in that case you don't hurt their feelings." I was really surprised and shocked, because that was against my nature, besides, it possessed all the features of hypocrisy. When I protested that I was raised to be honest and tell the truth about my feelings, another friend told me to collect all my African values and dump them in the garbage, because "this is America!" and those values don't work here. I began to learn more about that phrase: somebody is shot: "this is America!" A child is kidnapped: "this is America!" Everything that is stunning or that looks a little weird: "this is America!" Now I think I am beginning to understand what that means.

Monday, August 9, 2010

Welcome to America

I hope all of you had a great weekend! Thanks again for checking the blog. Today, I want to talk about a personal experience. Most immigrants would understand what I am talking about. You know that feeling you have when you dream that you will go to America.


It began with a dream. My friend and I used to think that going to America wasn't something that could happen to people like us. When we were younger, we thought that America was a country from outer space. We imagined that Americans were super humans who would blow up the earth and go live in the moon. I remember when Reagan was president; my friend told me that Americans would never let their president die, that they could replace everything in him; his heart, his brain and his body parts to make him immortal. The idea we had was that there was nothing Americans couldn't do. Not to mention the great movies, the terrific music, the splendid beaches and above all, opportunities. In the mind of the African that I was and still am, America was Heaven.



Applying for the American visa in Cameroon was like applying for a seat in paradise. Obtaining the American visa was like obtaining a certificate to become a god. That was what happened to me. When I obtained my American visa in 2006, the world instantaneously shrunk and became like a small ball in my head. I was caught by the invincibility syndrome, I thought there was nothing harder than obtaining an American visa. I felt empowered and transformed; I felt like an American, after all, I was going to America, wasn't I? The party and celebration that followed after I obtained the American visa was indescribable. My friends literally bowed to me when they were talking to me. For them, I wasn't like them anymore. I was different; I was an "American" already. My visa was the key to success and life.



On Friday, December 29, 2006 when my plane landed at JFK, I couldn't believe that I was breathing the same air as the people I saw on movies or those I thought were super humans. A couple of hours later, when I was welcomed at Hartsfield-Jackson Atlanta International Airport in the middle of the winter, the cold air that hit me there was the first hint of what my hopes, boldness and dreams were going to turn into.



After two weeks in Atlanta and one week in Nashville, I couldn't recognize my face anymore. My visage was lacerated by the icy-cold weather, it was dry and the skin began to peel off, I was worried, but I survived it. The real baptism was when I moved to California. I arrived at the San Francisco International Airport on Wednesday, January 17, 2007 at 9:35 pm. My host drove me to San Jose. Two weeks later I was struck by paralyzing sciatica. I was bed-stricken for four months and my best and only friend was loneliness. Loneliness? I never knew what that meant when I was in Cameroon. Well, I soon had to get used to it. Living in the suburb of San Jose didn't help me much. I had an excruciating pain and had nobody to talk to. I had to crawl to get a glass of water to drink. There were no human beings around. When I peeked outside, all I could see were cars going up and down. When I started walking with crutches, I went to a freeway overpass off Saratoga Avenue. I was standing there looking at the cars speeding on either bound of the freeway. I began to think of where those cars might possibly be going in such a hurry. I then called my host and begged him to take me where I could physically see people. He felt sorry for me and took me to a mall at around 11pm. I was so happy to see real people walking and talking, not mirages or shadows.



When I began to shop, I was faced with self-service machines and the other option was on-line services. Everything was setup as a barrier between people. I was shocked to see some people rushing or literally running to do something. Folks gave me their phone numbers or emails, but they never returned calls or messages. They certainly were too busy. Nobody ever had time to talk or socialize. I became slowly disillusioned about everything I read, heard or saw on TV or movies. At work, I always had the feeling that people were talking in parables or behind my back. Even the English language that I learnt back home became totally different from the one spoken in America. I met a guy whom I thought was my best friend, but I discovered that he hung out with me simply because I could pick him up and drop him off. Everything seemed fake and superficial. I became more and more isolated. Back home, I used to have dozens of friends around me every day, but now and here I was looking for only one real and less superficial friend.



I walked on the street, nobody waved to me. Everybody looked sad, stressed or depressed. I wondered if the images of the hungry African children that they showed on the news weren't far much better than those faces I saw. The faces of fear and worry. The visages that were scared to lose their jobs and homes. Those faces that struggled to make ends meet. Those faces that were so cold and distant. Those faces that were so isolated and isolating. Those faces that were restless and looking for a job. Those faces that didn't know true happiness. Those faces that were scared to go back home and find nobody to talk to. Those faces that were afraid to wake up in the morning and realize that they were all alone. Those faces that were anxious about the future. Those faces that were struggling to find the right partner. Those faces that were engaged in improbable love. Those faces that always met people who were emotionally unavailable. Those faces that thought they ran out of time to start a family. Those faces that lived recklessly to conceal their unhappiness. Those faces that couldn't find peace from within themselves. Those faces that went through a painful divorce or break-up and couldn't get over it. Those faces that were hurt in the past and feared to trust again. Those faces that were in good relationships for the bad reasons. Those faces that were in bad relationships for the good reasons. Those faces that were so withered by incessant tribulations. Those faces that cried for help.



I was one of those faces. On Saturday, April 10, 2010, I had a surgery and stayed at the hospital for six days. I had no visits and realized how lonely I was. For the first time, since I came to America, I missed home (Cameroon). Whenever I felt lonely, an echo in the back of my mind would say "welcome to America." I would go to the Emeryville or Berkeley Marina and stare at the water or go to the Oakland-Berkeley hills and walk on the Skyline hiking trail and comfort myself and say "you are not alone".


I love this country for all the opportunities it offers, but sometimes, I wonder if the pursuit of happiness isn't simply a new form of slavery? Am I not slowly being transformed into a cold and heartless robot? Can I chase the wind and catch it, or run after the time and tame it? Why do I feel lonely even when I am in the middle of the multitude? Why should we feel isolated? What has become of our sense of humanity? I am blessed and lucky to be in this wonderful country, but how can we make it a much better, less isolating and more sociable place?

Wednesday, August 4, 2010

Africa is not a country

Many thanks to all of you who are keeping this blog exciting. I received many positive and constructive feedbacks through comments, emails and in person. I would like to seize this opportunity to make my position clear in response to some questions that were asked. 1) I am not an Afro-pessimistic; I am an Afro-optimistic. I believe in the future of Africa and know that Africa has a lot to offer. 2) I cannot tackle all the problems of Africa and find the magical solution in this article. The following is an excerpt of the first chapter of my book:

[I am a Cameroonian and Cameroon is one of the fifty-three countries of Africa. When I was growing up, I was told that Africa was the cradle of civilization and the place where life originated. The teachings I received were about the pride of Africa as the rarest place where life and nature were still respected and where love and peace reigned. I became quickly disillusioned when I opened myself to the world. For many people, Africa was just one big country; a reservoir of war, famine, corruption and diseases, a place crippled with lack of education, sanitation and civilities. I also learned that Africa was a useless leech crying with desperation for assistance. Now I had two conflicting views of my continent: how I saw it from inside out and how people saw it from outside in.


Far from me to deny my “Africanity”, I am simply exposing my “Cameroonity”. I am all for Kwame Nkrumah’s suggestion of the Unites States of Africa and Pan-Africanism currently advocated by Muammar al-Gaddafi. I strongly believe in African Unity and now African Union. I just feel the urge to emphasize the complexity of Africa and the uniqueness of its countries.

In the summer of 2006, a group of young American Christians came from Dallas, Texas, to train Cameroonian kids in leadership. Some of them struggled with the confusion between Cameroon and Africa. Each time they wanted to talk about Cameroon, they referred to it as Africa. I got a little annoyed by that confusion and reminded them that Cameroon was a country and Africa was a continent. One young American girl came to me and said:

“Thank you for that distinction, I didn’t know the difference before.”

“You are welcome, I am happy to help,” I said. “Could you do me a favor?”

“Of course and what would that be?” she asked.

“When you go back to America, if people ask you ‘where did you go last summer?’ please tell them ‘I went to Cameroon’ instead of ‘I went to Africa’, and when they ask you ‘and where is Cameroon?’ tell them ‘Cameroon is a country in West Africa’ then they would be able to find Cameroon on a map as a country and realize that Africa is actually a continent.”

“Yes, I promise that from now on I will no more call Cameroon Africa and will explain to people that Cameroon is a country in Africa.” She promised.

As I continued to talk to people about Africa and Cameroon, something absurd was happening. The so-called “Sommet France-Afrique” – a kind of summit between one country in Europe, France, and an entire continent, Africa – was expanding. France would summon all African leaders and pontificate them on their progress, and they would be listening like little obedient servants. I then questioned myself why France, as one country, thought it had the power to dictate fifty-three countries on what to do? I had never heard the super power and mighty United States arrogantly say that there was a US-Asia summit or US-Europe summit not to mention US-Africa summit. Even though giant China was invading Africa economically and population-wise, I was still craving to see what would come out of the increasing China-Africa summit.

A few years earlier when South Africa proposed their bid to organize the soccer World Cup championship in 2010, there was a big skepticism; people said that Africa wasn’t ready to organize a major event. They said there was too much poverty, disease, war, insecurity and inexperience, not to mention the lack of infrastructure. Nevertheless, since all the other continents had already organized the event many times in the past, they pitifully offered the bid to South Africa like a father who had five children and realized that four of them had always benefited from his largesse, then, he decided reluctantly to trust the discriminated last child. The whole world cried to boycott the games in South Africa after an incident that happened during the African Cup of Nations in Angola in January 2010. A few rebels in the Cabinda enclave trapped and machine-gunned two buses carrying Togolese players and staff and killed some of them. People began to say that Africa wasn’t safe and they should strip South Africa of the World Cup. The answer from the South Africa officials was that they shouldn’t be punished for something that happened 1543.64 miles away from them. They argued that if there was war in Angola, it didn’t mean that people should not feel safe in South Africa, in the same way that if there was war in Kosovo –which is even closer to Germany – that should not prevent Germany from organizing a World Cup.

The entire world was positively surprised by the tremendous success of the South Africa World Cup 2010. The president of the soccer governing body (FIFA), Joseph Sepp Blatter, said that South Africa had exceeded all expectations: the ten stadiums were excellent and better than those in Europe and elsewhere, the organization was flawless and the security impeccable. The game itself was of good quality with fewer cards than the previous World Cups, not to mention the fantastic exhibition of culture and joie de vivre. If there were any hitches at all, they came not from the organization, but from FIFA itself: poor refereeing, i.e. a clear US goal against Slovenia and a clear England goal against Germany both denied, just citing those two.

I am always intrigued by the consistent and permanent image of desolation projected onto my continent and the generalization attached to it. There is civil war in the Democratic Republic of Congo, but there isn’t civil war in Cameroon even though some people would argue that the absence of war doesn’t mean that we are at peace. Ghana is democratically more advanced than Zimbabwe which is still crumbling under a dictatorship regime. What about the Maghreb and the Nile – our Arab neighbors in the North? From Morocco to Egypt, there are huge differences. We are all Africans and happy to be, but there are intrinsic distinctions in our aspirations as individual countries. It is true that we have some corrupt leaders in Cameroon, it is also true that we have a dysfunctional government, but does that make me any different from, let’s say, a random child in a more advanced country? As a Cameroonian, am I really an anathema, or Godforsaken, or gone in the wrong direction or doomed to perdition as people who see me from outside in want me to believe? It is true that I struggle with poverty; it is also true that I don’t have the latest technology and the most advanced science, but does that make me less human than those who have it? As a Cameroonian, what can I then bring to the gathering of the world’s nations?

I then realized that, of course, I do have something to bring to the give-and-take meeting of the world’s nations. It might not be the latest iPod or PlayStation or cancer cure or any of the things that make developed countries so special. It might not be luxury and opulence, imposing skyscrapers and magnificent highways, latest fashion or stunning scientific discovery. What I have to offer is simply what makes me a human being: my story, my culture, my world vision, my journey as a Cameroonian in the world.]

Now, to answer people who asked me to suggest solutions to the African problems, I will simply say that I don't believe that violence is the silver bullet here. It will only bring chaos. I don't also believe that we can influence the current African leaders; they are corrupt to their core. Like I said in my previous article; the solution to the African problems is not going to come from the West or from the East. It will come from us, Africans. We need to change our mindset and our mentality. We need to get rid of all the lies that were forged in our brain. We need to change our culture of dependency and unaccountability. We need to change ourselves before changing what we want to change. We need a generation of young African leaders and get rid of the current leaders with their colonial mentality. Those who think they must stay in power until death removes them need to go. Those who spend their time changing the constitution every day to remain in power need to give way. How can you explain that a country like Cameroon that obtained its independence on January 1, 1960 had only two presidents? The first stayed in power for more than 20 years and the current one has been in power for more than 25 years. How can we change that? I will tell you how.

Before the US became what it is, it was a bunch of British colonies that decided to expand and build this magnificent country. Before the European Union became what it is, it was a bunch of wealthy European countries that came together as a block and imposed conditions and requirements to the little European countries if they wanted to join the Union. We can also copy that system. It might or might not work, but we have nothing to lose in trying. The wealthy and stable countries in Africa need to come together as a group. I mean those that have shown some real signs of democracy and development. I am thinking of countries like South Africa and Ghana and to some extent Senegal. Cameroon is stable, but not democratic, so it shouldn't be part of that group. Nigeria is rich, but not very stable, so it can be on the wait list. Those wealthy, or I would say those democratically stable countries, would call themselves "The United Countries of Africa" and then they would impose some requirements and conditions for other very corrupt African countries to join them. That might be the solution we need.

Monday, August 2, 2010

Is Africa doomed to failure?

Once again, thanks to all of you who contribute to the growth of this blog. Our blog is growing every day. Some of you leave comments, some prefer to send feedbacks through my email and others just visit the blog. I appreciate your input.
Today, I would like to talk about an issue that hits my hot button. I am not trying to lecture anybody on the issue, but I am simply sharing my views. I begin with a quote from a French anthropologist, Stephen Smith, who cruelly declared that: "since independence, Africa has been working at its re-colonization. In any case, even if this was not the intention, it couldn't have done a better job. The continent is doomed to failure. No one is ready to take it on." Shocking? On the surface, yes, but when you go deeper into the facts, you might discover that it possesses some truth in it. Enough with blaming everything on the back of colonization! It is outdated already, and as Africans we should know better. Taking responsibilities can only make us improve. If Africans don't change their mindset, they are definitely "doomed to failure". There is myriad of examples to back my point. One day, I was at the Hilton Hotel in Yaounde, Cameroon -the poshest hotel in the country. A Cameroonian person casually dressed tried to go in the hotel, but he was stopped at the gate and turned away by his countrymen. The reason was that he wasn't dressed up enough to be accepted inside. A couple of minutes later, a French man dressed in rags came and the doorkeepers bowed to him and let him in. Why? Well, because he was a French man, so he was entitled.
Gaston Kelman is a Cameroonian writer who lives in France. He is now a French citizen. He is also the manager of a development company. He took some of his employees -who are white French citizen- to his village. When they got there, the villagers rolled out the red carpet for the white French men and ignored him. As he tried to introduce his employees, folks interrupted him and said that he should shut up because he had nothing to tell them, but that he should let the white men talk. They believed that nothing truthful could come out of a Blackman's mouth, just like the proverb in my village that says that "only the truth comes out of a white man's mouth."
There are many examples of self-discrimination in the day-to-day lives of most Africans. Africans still think that they cannot take care of themselves. The leaders, after embezzling public funds, point an accusing finger at the West. Now that they have been sufficiently bullied by their bosses in the West, they are prostituting themselves with China. Guinea's late president, Lansana Conte, was praising China in 2006 in these words: "There's no one like the Chinese! At least they work. They live with us in the mud. Some of them grow rice like me. I gave them a worn-out piece of land. You should see what they have done with it!" The old man's face was so bright and looked like he was rejuvenating while he was mentioning those words. In the same line, the former Nigerian president, Obassandjo, said that it was time for China to lead the world and it was in Africa's best interest to follow China. African leaders are so excited about China invading the continent. In their views, China is the savior who is going to save them against the bullying West. More importantly, China doesn't put its nose in their politics and governance like the West does. Sassou Nguesso, the president of Congo-Brazzaville, pointed out that as opposed to what the West is selling, Africa doesn't need democracy, but Africa needs development. So I wonder if democracy and development are exclusive or inclusive.
The excitement is so great that some leaders are racing to be the best prostitute. In my own country of Cameroon, President Paul Byia spread Cameroon's legs and asked the Chinese to enjoy them as much as they want. Chinese now don't need passports or visas to come to Cameroon. The president granted them the freedom to come as many as they possibly can, and stay as long as they want, and do what they want. Of course, the competition is now ferocious. Even the street cleaning jobs that some poor Cameroonians held to raise their families are now taken over by the Chinese. I don't even want to mention the prostitution world where the Chinese beauties are beating our countrywomen in every front.
Everywhere in Africa now, little Africans are learning Chinese with such frenzy, but their counterparts have nothing to do with local languages. It seems to be a done deal now; even some prominent officials from the West admit that Africa has gone East. An American diplomat in Brazzaville said bluntly that: "God bless the Chinese. They build roads and dams, and quite frankly we don't have what it takes to do those things anymore. All we can do is give English classes and try to sell our technology." Okay, Africa is a market, I mean a big cake, but where are our leaders in all that? What role do they play? To cut a cake, you need a knife and a hand to hold the knife. Are our leaders conscious of where they really want to take the continent? I am all for the cooperation with China, but shouldn't there be some kind of guidelines? Granted, they are hard working people, but when they overpower the little street cleaner or cart pusher who rely on that to feed his family of ten, shouldn't the government do something? Should we trust the Chinese? We have been deceived many times in the past. The Europeans also came as saviors, with their big bibles, as the messengers of God. They asked us to get rid of everything that defined us: totems, talisman, etc, they said we were worshiping Satan. Then, they began to build churches, schools, etc, and before we knew it, we were colonized. They efficiently applied the MMM: Merchants, Missionaries, Militaries. Now we have the Chinese proposing cooperation only in the field of development and they let our leaders messing up with national revenues. What are their long term goals? We underwent the atrocities of the West, what would be China's punishment? Poor Africa, where are your protectors? Why do they let you be ripped apart with no mercy?

Oh, children of Africa, we are to blame as well. Traditional Africa is dying! Where are those values that saw me grow up? Sharing, nurturing and caring, what have they become? Empathizing and sympathizing with our neighbors, Gathering under the big Baobab or around the fire to tell stories and congratulate each other on our achievements, where has that feeling gone? One's success was the pride of the whole community, but not anymore, why? We do know what is wrong with the continent, why don't we fix it? All we have now is jealousy: if you do better than I do, I will kill you; instead of I will support you like we did before. If your child does better than mine, I will poison him; instead of I will bless him like we did before. All we have now is witchcraft: if your child is smarter than mine in school, I will eat her in witchcraft instead of I will give her a present like we did before.
We used to be good in communication, because of our oral tradition. Oral communication was our faire valoir. Now, we are left with poor communication. We never get to say what we think. We conceal the truth and give poor directives, because we want others to fail. We used to be good and understanding, but now we lack understanding badly. We create unhealthy working environment and refuse to be in others' shoes, because we don't want them to succeed. Extremist tendencies were foreign to us, but now we lack affirmation; either we underestimate ourselves, or we over estimate ourselves and become arrogant and inefficient. We lack vision and we are professionally short-sighted sometimes. We have become unabashedly egocentric. We think of us first before thinking of the others. We don't want to give room to our successors, just like our leaders who have been in power for decades and don't want to go.
This is what we need. We need to radically change our mentalities. The help we receive from developed countries is not the solution. Needless to say where that help ends up. Furthermore, we are just having fish and don't learn how to fish. Let's stop being leeches. Our solution would not come from outside, it would come from within ourselves. We need a new leader who will train and change mentalities. Bad mentality is our real poverty. Our continent is rich; let no one tell you the contrary, but we as people are poor mentally. We should think about what we can do for our continent and not the other way around. Knowledge is the base. We should hungrily look for knowledge. We should build skills. We should build capacities. We should learn how to manage information. We must develop an entrepreneurial spirit. We should set high standards. Let's not forget that it took centuries for some developed countries to develop.

Thursday, July 29, 2010

Dilemma

I want to take a moment to profoundly thank all of you for your valuable comments. I also want to suggest that if you have a real life topic that bothers you, and you want to discuss it on this forum and receive ideas from other people, please let me know. We need each other sometimes to go through difficult times in our lives. The next topics were suggested to me by friends, mostly men, who have been struggling with them for years now. These are the stories:

1)  Bob is deeply in love with Elise. Both are in their late thirties and early forties. They have been dating for a couple of years now and thought their love was indestructible, but now that apparent solid love is threatened. Bob wants a child, but Elise doesn't. Elise says that she doesn't see why she should try to bring another child in this world when there are already so many suffering children who need help. Her solution is to adopt a child and to love him/her like she would do if she had a biological one. Bob disagrees. He wants his own biological child. He wonders what the power of procreation feels like. He fancies a child that would look like him. His dream is to perpetuate the family line and name. A child he will raise, play with, teach things. He wants to have that feeling that biological fathers have when they look at their new-born baby at the hospital. He says he can't feel the same with an adopted child. Their relationship is suffering from that dilemma and is on the verge of collapsing. What can they do?

2) The second story is about Paul. He has been with Amber for five years now. Amber had a son with another guy before she met Paul. In the beginning, everything was fine. Paul thought it wasn't an issue at all. Now Paul is not sure anymore. In fact, Paul doesn't think she is the one. Why? Well, because she already has a son who is not from him. She is genuinely in love with him and believes that he is the one. Yet, Paul doesn't want to settle with her and is looking for another woman with whom he can have his own child. The problem is that he doesn't know how to put an end to that relationship that has been going on for many years. More importantly, he doesn't want to hurt her. What can they do?

NB: Names have been changed to protect the identity of the people involved.

Any thoughts or ideas?

Your comments are highly appreciated.

Thank you

Wednesday, July 28, 2010

Life or Science

Since September 2004, an American laboratory called Gilead has been testing a preventive medication for HIV/AIDS called Viread (or Viread DF) in Cameroon. They hired and paid a man 800,000 dollars to recruit young and uninformed Cameroonian girls to serve as laboratory rats. They promised to pay 4 Euros -approximately 5 dollars- per month to every girl who will be infected.

Officially, 400 young and uneducated girls were recruited. After being contaminated by the virus, they were simply abandoned by the laboratory officials who promised to take care of them.

An officer of the Ministry of Health unabashedly said that his position has been created because of the existence of that American Lab, therefore, there was nothing he could do to remedy the situation.

Currently, more cases of such experiments are taking place in many developing countries.

Should life be sacrificed for science?